wind and green marzipan

The world is wild. The wind is wild.

I couldn't sleep last night and now I stand in a school kitchen, cutting thousands of slices of princess cake. Strangers around me sort boxes of free food for the needy and chatter easily in two languages. We couldn't sleep last night because we worried about ourselves. This morning we decided to worry about the even more helpless. We came together to sort lettuce from bread and cut princess cake.

Outside, the wild wind throws up dust devils to prove how scary the world is. But people still want to help people and my kitchen world is a calmness of green marzipan.

words to bring home

I will change your name
You shall no longer be called
Wounded, Outcast,
Lonely or Afraid
I will change your name
Your new name shall be
Confidence, Joyfulness, Overcoming One,
Faithfulness, Friend of God,
One Who Seeks My Face

(D.J. Butler: "I Will Change Your Name")

I found these words on the other side of the world in 1996 and took them home with me. They are still pinned up on the inside of a kitchen cupboard door.

They are still a summary of pretty much everything I aspire to.

no way to Venice

I binge-watched Marco Polo, the TV series, on Netflix recently and dreamed myself away to the steppes of Central Asia.

The Marco Polo of this series often looks up at the starry skies. His father, who cruelly left him alone at the mercy of Kublai Khan, told him that the stars of Orion's Belt will lead him back home to Venice.

A month or so ago, I bought a ticket to Venice for a long-planned exploration trip of Italy with friends. Well, that trip has now been cruelly cancelled as all of Europe locks itself away for a while.

Now I look to Orion for guidance. It is no easier for me than for poor Marco to find a way to Venice.

viral days

These are viral days and I'm stocking up on books, vitamins, potatoes, Netflix, tofu and apples. The only thing I'm afraid of is tension neck and lack of love.

When will I learn to breathe right, live right? A quarantine could not make me feel more stuck than I am already.