Thursday, February 12, 2015

this business business is so complicated

I am the born employee - fiercely loyal, eager to please, dutiful to a fault. Smart and multi-tasking like a demon. So why do I sit through a day of lectures on how to start your own company? In embroidered white clothes and angelic hair, no less.

Maybe it was to meet men. If you want smart, strong men of various ages gathered in a room, go to a lecture on entrepreneurship. (There were many women there, too. My people are a people of entrepreneurs.) Fascinating, how many ages, professions and dreams were having coffee together.

So I sat there, absorbing information on how to set up and run your own company. "Motivation is vital," the lecturer said.

I thought to myself, "I have everything it takes. Except motivation."

Admittedly, I also lack even the most basic understanding of bookkeeping. Even if you hire someone to do it for you, you should probably at least be able to understand concepts like turnover and cash flow. Maybe if I work really hard I can squeeze these things into my mathematically challenged brain.

But motivation is more complicated than bookkeeping. The only motivating factor I can think of is the mental image of myself doing a job that I love, sitting at a café table in a foreign city. Not sure that will get me through the process of creating a successful business.

The fact is staring me in the face, however: I may have to choose between unemployment and starting up my own business.

 But I made friends. Not with any of the gorgeous, single men. With a middle-aged woman and a very young, very gay man.

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